Book Reviews in 30 seconds

Influencer - Simply Amazing, a must read for anybody who wants to get better at communication.'

I Read Minds, And so do you - rife with misinformation and hyperbole, but an engaging read the nonetheless... definitely worth a look.

The Inner Game Of Selling - Nothing new in here, but a few of the procedures, as well as the applications to selling, are very good. If you're in sales, take a look.

Emotional Intelligence - Can get techinical at times, but REALLY interesting. Provides a sound scientific basis for a lot of the spiritual/self help material out there. Great for skeptics.

Twilight - I just didn't like it. But if you're a young PUA who wants a good example of how to lead... get it. Every single girl I know is in love with Edward right now.

The Light Fantastic - As always, Pratchet delivers. Funny and poignant.

Personal Development for Smart People - Not yet finished... but from what I've read, it's gonna be a must have. Instant Classic. Always been a fan of steves, so when I heard he was coming out with a book, immediately signed up... I'm even more of a fan now.

Accept the Inner Bitch

Disturbing trend I've noticed lately in the seduction community is people thinking they have gotten rid of the ego.

They think that they have completely removed their inner bitch, and are now only acting through their inner man. They call themselves "enlightened".

Newsflash:
If you participate in internet seduction discussion, you still have an ego.

The day that:
1. I am completely present 100% if the time (95% doesn't cut it)
and
2. My life is completely aligned with my purpose, and the actions that I take while present are 100% aligned with my life.

Then I will say that I no longer have an ego. I will truly have empowered my inner man, the Inner bitch will no longer be an issue.

The problem with the inner bitch is that by it's very nature it has a number of tricky qualities that make it so hard to eliminate. It's self-deceptive, self-reinforcing, and it has a huge interest in self-preservation, which is why just when you think you've gotten rid of it completely, you'll realize that it has reappeared in another form.

Let's look at how this plays out in people who think they've become enlightened.

People began to be aware of their ego, they learn to be present, and stop having those judgemental thoughts.

But the inner bitch has an interest in self-preservation, it's not gonna let them get away that easily. It lies in wait, in the depths of your subconscious mind, waiting for its chance.

All it takes is one thought: "I am enlightened." and BOOM, the inner bitch will see its chance and strike. The inner bitch takes this thought and starts to build itself up again around this thought. Rather than getting validation from others, it will get validation from this concept of enlightment.

Once it takes hold, its self-reinforcing qualities help it grow big and strong again. Every time you see others judging people, it's seductive voice will whisper to you : "It's a good thing YOU don't do that, you're enlightened." Self deception at its best.

Every time someone tries to get into an argument with you, you remain cool. Your inner bitch whispers "You're above petty reactiveness, you're enlightened." Again, your inner bitch takes the concept and fucks with it... the thought of not being reactive causes you to be reactive.

Eventually your inner bitch starts to get stronger, and as it does, it gets more daring. Now it no longer has to whisper, it can direct you as it wishes. It can give you wonderful backwards rationalizations like: "I can really think whatever I want about people, because I'm enlightened, so it's not judging."

Notice that the iner bitch takes good concepts, but because they're coming from the wrong place, they are actually self defeating. If the inner bitch says it is non-judgemental, it causes judgement, if it thinks it's unreactive, it causes reactiveness. If it thinks it's enlightened, it causes ego.

The solution: Self Awareness and choice.

When you realize the inner bitch for what it is, it ceases to have power over you.

You need to accept the fact that you have an ego. Realize that it's going to be a long time before your inner bitch is gone, and have the self awareness to realize that it's still there.

Realize when your inner bitch is making all those seductive littler whispers to you, and CHOOSE to ignore them. Rather than thinking "I am enlightened", CHOOSE every second of every day to be enlightened. Discover what your inner man believes, what his values are, and CHOOSE to act through these. More in the coming months.

Quick response to a comment I got in August.

Someone posted a wonderful comment on my "She left me with dick in hand" FR that I wanted to take a second to respond to. It's a short comment, but it brings up a lot of great points.

What if... just maybe... they weren't backwards rationalizations?

Just a thought, in keeping with the whole "listening" thing.

Like your blog. Any one-line advice for a guy who's not trying to get in bed with anyone but just trying not to be a douche to family and friends?

I LOVE this comment. First of all, it's great to see that this is appealing to guys not just in "the game." That's my intent. That's what ultimately I want this blog to be about, and I LOVE that someone not in the game found this.

Now about your first point, and I'm REALLY glad someone called me out on my bullshit. This is something I always try to caution guys about when I give them a breakdown of my interactions. Yes, other people have backwards rationalizations, and ego, but SO DO I. My reality is just as skewed as theirs is. The truth of the matter is somewhere in the middle.

Second part. One line advice for a guy who's not trying to get laid, but just trying to be a positive influence to family in friends (positive reframe added by me). Here goes:

Accept everyone. Truly realize that in their core everyone is a good person, and let them know that you can see this good person inside them.

If there was one line of fortune cookie advice that could lead to a wonderful life, this would be it.